Love and sex advice from
Dan Savage
America’s sweetheart
Explore by
Filter by year

What about the gay penguins?

Episode #698 — March 10, 2020

Sometimes people call us when they're drunk. Sometimes they call us about their dogs. Welcome to the center of this Venn diagram. A woman has been invited to a "costume wedding." She will be required to dress up like a character in a movie. Is this asking too much? On the Magnum version of the show, it's a super-weird "What You Got?" with an evolutionary reproductive biologist who mulls over the *possibility* that the animal kingdom is teeming with same-sex behavior. Not just the homo penguins. And, a young woman is turned on by much older men. How can she score a silver fox without looking like gold digger?
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now

With the brililant Peggy Orenstein

Episode #693 — February 4, 2020

A woman is hoping to find a monogamous partner who is also kinky. But when she puts the word "kinky" in her profile she gets flooded with ridiculous pervs. How can she filter out the clueless horndogs? Hear the very unpleasant tale of a gay couple who venture to an older man's apartment for a hook-up, only to find there were many more men there than promised. Why was this gentleman so dishonest? Aren't older men supposed to be supportive mentors for up and coming young 'mos? On the Magnum, Dan speaks with super-duper smart writer Peggy Orenstein, (author of Girls and Sex) about her new book- Boys and Sex. She and Dan discuss how boys both suffer from and then perpetuate the culture of toxic masculinity. If you have a kid with a penis, you should listen to this one. A man is ordained to marry people through one of those mail-in certificates. His sister has asked him to perform her marriage ceremony. But her fiancé is a lying, coke addled, no-good drunk! How can he bless this mess? 206-302-2064 or voicemail@savagelovecast.com
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now

Happy poly homes with Dr. Elisabeth Sheff.

Episode #692 — January 28, 2020

Have you ever experienced conflict during a family vacation? The first call on this show might put it all in perspective for you. A protective big sister can't stand that her 17 year-old sis is dating a 21 year-old man. Their parents don't mind. Should big sister give the guy a chance, or is the age difference unacceptable? On the Magnum, Dan chats with Dr. Elisabeth Sheff from Psychology Today about raising children within a polyamorous household. And finally, a woman is considering becoming a fin-dom, with the power to financially ruin her client. But she doesn't want to ruin anyone. Is there a way to ethically do this?
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now

Erika Moen's holiday sex toy picks!

Episode #686 — December 17, 2019

The show begins with an insecurity vampire. You know the kind. A person who sucks you dry with their endless need for praise and reassurance. This man is dating one, but is she entirely to blame? It's complicated. And, it's a wedding battle royale! In one corner we have our caller getting married to a man who has a child by a previous marriage- living out of town. In the other corner is the fiancé's mother, who wants to minimize contact between the kid and the caller. Whose side are you on? Grab some popcorn and listen in. On the Magnum, Santa's rollin' up! What's he got this time? Well, if he listens to resident sex toy expert Erika Moen (and he does,) out tumbles a massive cache of marital aids, including a cock sleeve that spins! A bullet vibe! A dual density dildo! "Sex in a Can! " And a Sex Machine. Like an actual machine. Not Santa himself. Is it January yet? And finally, a lesbian is in a stable, joyful, poly relationship. But she is grappling with a new partner in the scene, who has a medical condition that causes her to burp and fart all the time. It's driving the caller bonkers. She considers this a real torment. We consider it podcast gold. 206-302-2064 voicemail@savagelovecast.com
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now

Money and vaginas.

Episode #671 — September 3, 2019

A gay man is fed up with all the public sex at gay pride parades! It's bad PR! Enough already! Will Dan agree? Listen and find out. A woman is planning to marry. Her fiancé has a lot less money than she does, and they maintain separate bank accounts. When she marries, should they combine their finances? Should she get a prenup? Dan brings in Paul Sullivan- the "Wealth Matters" columnist from the NYT- to discuss these potentially thorny issues. On the Magnum, Dan Savage (a known homosexual male) discusses vaginas with Dr. Jen Gunter. Her new book The Vagina Bible rules and you should buy it and then read it. And, a woman's boyfriend is 13 years older than her and calls himself pansexual. Not surprisingly, it gets more complicated.
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now
A woman is tormented that her partner of 7 years has not learned how to pee without spraying the area. Dan's response is both charitable and practical. A 70 year-old man is in an open relationship with his wife. He is communicating with a 30 year-old woman online who lives out of town. How can he verify her identity without offending her? Also, he doesn't want to take advantage of her. But who will be taking advantage of whom? Now. Did you notice the episode number? On the Magnum, Dan interviews Lucien Greaves, founder of the Satanic Temple about the work they're doing to challenge our nation's shift toward a Christian theocracy. Dan and Lucien also handle a wedding etiquette question, assuring us that in Satanic weddings no gift is required. Lucien Greaves is one of our all-time favorite interviews and if you haven't yet sampled the Magnum version of the show- this is the one to try. Also, Dan counsels a woman who married the man she met at Burning Man. The problem? He doesn't like to fuck. Wut? 206-302-2064 Check out the "Hail Satan?" documentary here.
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now

Summer sex toys! With Erika Moen.

Episode #664 — July 16, 2019

A reasonable woman is about to visit her over-the-top Christian family. Her sister has invited her to join a book club when she's there. Guess what the book is! Should the caller sit through her sister's stealth Bible study, or find a way to politely decline? Or perhaps there's yet another way... A man used to be the cartoon editor for his college newspaper. This was before he got woke, and he is now mortified to recall some nasty anti-gay comics that he published. Should he apologize? Submit new cartoons reflecting his newly enlightened views? Speaking of comics, Dan brings on the ever-delightful comic artist Erika Moen (co-creator of "Oh Joy Sex Toy") to discuss hot summer sex toys. And, on the Magnum, a man recalls how his ex-girlfriend had an abortion. He was there to help her the whole time, and it effected them both. Now that time has passed and he has a wife and kids, how should he talk about the experience, without betraying his ex-girlfriend's experience? 206-302-2064
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now

Weed = Better Orgasms for Women. Yay Science!

Episode #650 — April 9, 2019

Look at her. She's only a lesbian when she's drunk! Why does she dream of a white picket fence with her loving wife by her side but only when she's had 5 whisky sours? A woman is planning to marry prince charming. He is so wonderful in every way. Except...when he wants sex he grabs her head and pulls it down to his crotch. Is this just how men ask for sex these days? On the Magnum, Dan's suspicions are confirmed by science ONCE AGAIN. This time, he speaks with Dr. Becky Lynn about the effect marijuana has on female orgasm. And, hear the tale of the older gay man, his much younger Panamanian boyfriend and the worried daughter. 206-302-2064
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now

With Andrew Rannells

Episode #647 — March 19, 2019

A woman and her husband are having a difficult year. And to top it off, he divulged that he likes to wear women's clothes, and would like to raid her closet. She worries that this is just the first step toward a transgender identity. Do straight men ever like to wear women's clothes? (Spoiler: Yes.) A woman's conservative cousin has started working at a "Crisis Parenting Center," that gives misinformation about abortion. Should she confront her? On the Magnum, Dan chats with his soul brother the Broadway god Andrew Rannells. Discussion topics: black sheets, home decor, male unicorns, and Andrew's new memoir- Too Much is Not Enough: A Memoir of Fumbling Toward Adulthood." And, here's a conundrum. A vegan is into leather. Discuss. 206-302-2064
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now

Dating with Disabilities

Episode #640 — January 29, 2019

Therapy is good right? It gets you in touch with your feelings. Unless...those feelings you are getting in touch with are jealousy, paranoia and possessiveness. Sometimes it's time to BACK AWAY FROM THE FEELINGS. Anyway, here's the kind of question you really came for: A woman is about to turn thirty and wants to throw a big sex party with XTC a'flowin'. But she is also a mom and wants to invite her other mom friends. Should she offer them party drugs too? On the Magnum, Dan chats with Andrew Gurza from the Disability After Dark podcast to talk about dating when you have a disability. And, a bi woman is dating her first lady. The problem? This lady gets very, very, very, very wet. So wet that the caller wonders if she should keep a washcloth by the bed. You should have such problems, right? 206-302-2064
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now