Love and sex advice from
Dan Savage
America’s sweetheart
Explore by
Filter by year

The Bad Behavior Show

Episode #639 — January 22, 2019

Some of you are doing terrible things. We start with a teen who has been sneaking off with her mother's vibrator. How can her long-suffering parents encourage her to use one without using *that particular* one? A woman's new boyfriend begs her to let him change her tampon, saying it would bring them closer together. Is this a fetish of his? Is this a fetish of anyone's? This isn't "bad," per se but just what the Sam Hill is going on on here? On the Magnum, Dan chats with bad-assed victims' right's lawyer Carrie Goldberg about the hook-up app Grindr dragging their feet on intervening in some very serious harassment going on. Bad! And, we're not done, just you listen! A woman loves to cheat- she loves the sneaking around, the lying, all of it. She doesn't want poly, she wants to cheat! AND. A gay man regularly "sticks it in" without a condom, even when expressly forbidden to do so. That is so, so bad. Dan has his work cut out for him this week.
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now

Pasturbators

Episode #638 — January 15, 2019

A gay man is sick of always having to initiate with his new boyfriend. The boyfriend is a big guy, but very submissive. How can the caller get the dude to make a move now and again? A woman caught her fiancé wanking to photos of his exes. Now she feels jealous and insecure. How can she get over it? On the Magnum, hear two tales of companionate marriages: How to do it right, and how to do it wrong. And, a woman with baby fever is single, but hell bent on reproducing. She is convinced her parents will disapprove of her plan to find a sperm donor. But she's gonna do it anyway...
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now

Bad 'Stache

Episode #637 — January 8, 2019

A Jewish woman is bringing her boyfriend to the Hanukkah party. Great, right? But as always, there's a problem. He has a HITLER MUSTACHE. Because he "likes the look." Dan chats with this woman, and you get to listen. A young man's parents discovered kinky sexts on his phone. How can he explain BDSM to his freaked out mom n' pop? On the Magnum, a man is in an open relationship, but his girlfriend doesn't like that he sees sex workers. He just likes it. Should he try to stop? Or keep doing it and lie? Or break up? And Dan counsels a bi woman on how to support her younger gay cousin growing up in a hostile environment, just like she did.
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now

Using the poly label to cheat, cheat, cheat.

Episode #636 — January 1, 2019

The first call of 2019 is all about public sex. So that's how things are looking. We then move on to a deep, methodical analysis of the life cycle of your vibrator. How long should those things last anyway? On the Magnum, Dan chats with queer sex writer Sophie Saint Thomas about her article in Playboy titled "Are Some People Just Slapping the Poly Label on their Cheating?" We are very sorry to report that the answer is yes, yes they are. And, an anxious sister wants to counsel her 16 year-old brother on his plan to initiate a three-way with a couple of lucky young ladies in his class. Ah to be 16... 206-302-2064
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now

Hemorrhoids for Christmas.

Episode #635 — December 25, 2018

Gather round the Lovecast Christmas tree children, and see what audio gifts we have for you! Why, here's a question from a power bottom who pees when he gets fucked! And look! A woman's boyfriend won't use sex toys on her if they've been used before. Should she ask Santa to get her some brand new, still-in-the-box butt plugs? And, oh good heavens, Dan's friend Philip has some advice for a woman with hemorrhoids. He likens them to "a heart attack in your ass." On the Magnum version, which you should give as a gift because it is the Season of Giving,™ Alexander Cheves, writer for the Advocate and Out Magazine explains the disaster of Tumblr banning porn on its site. May your CandleNights be ever-bright. 206-302-2064
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now

Doggity Style!

Episode #634 — December 18, 2018

Dear Australia, Hi! This is the Savage Lovecast. Listen. Do you guys refer to the very common sexual position where a man enters a woman from behind while she is on all fours as ..."Doggity Style?" No? We didn't think so. (Both Dan and Nancy are gobsmacked by this call.) A man's friend has been accused of sexual assault from when they were both in a pseudo-Christian cult. The caller believes the women, but also wants to support his friend and help him to become a better person. How? Strap-ons...for MEN??!! Well, sure! So says Erika Moen, our resident sex toy expert, and co-author of a new sex ed book called Drawn to Sex: the Basics. And, on the Magnum version, does enjoyment of spicy food correlate to being a sub? Oh, for Christ's sake. 206-302-2064
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now

Welcome to the Real Doll Brothel.

Episode #633 — December 11, 2018

A woman had sex with a pre-op transwoman. But she didn't make the caller come, or even try. Now the caller wonders if this is a "vagina-bodied" vs "non vagina-bodied" problem, or just a "jerk" problem. A married gay man with kids begs Dan for a quick n' dirty guide on how to add a third partner into their relationship. How can they have adventures and maintain the sanctity of their family unit? On the Magnum version, check out Canada! They are slowly but surely opening sex doll & robot brothels. Is this gonna be ok? Dr. James Cantor, the Director of the Toronto Sexuality Center, is on to discuss the implications of this new phenomenon. Canada- you so freaky. A woman's sister is into drag, and wants to include the caller. The caller wants to dress up in female drag (even though she's a woman) but worries about culturally appropriating gay male culture's appropriation of women. Did you get all that? Spoiler! Dan tells her to chill out. High heels are super weird. 206-302-2064
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now
A man has tried group sex a couple times. But when he shows up his dick doesn't. What is going on here? Oh this story! A girl started seeing her therapist at age 17. At age 19, she confessed to her 45 year-old therapist that she loved him. So, naturally he told her that he loved her back. They married and had a kid. (Really.) Then they divorced. (Of course.) Now, when her kid or friends ask how she met her ex, she doesn't know what to say. What should she say? And how can she process all the disturbing, conflicting emotions? On the Magnum: You little whipper snappers! Why, when I was your age, we were doin' it like bunny rabbits all over the damn place! The youth of today are having less sex. They're even calling it a "sex recession." Kate Julian of The Atlantic is on to discuss her article exploring this unlikely phenomenon. And, a man's wife has been engaging in unauthorized wanking. She didn't fill out the proper forms. 206-302-2064
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now

With Stormy Daniels!

Episode #631 — November 27, 2018

Well looky who blew into town! Stormy Daniels came on over to our studio to answer callers' questions about blow jobs, toxic men, protecting the male ego and other hazards. Stormy and Dan got on like a house on fire, and you must listen to it. A couple questions are on the Micro version and many more are on the Magnum. Also, how to get used to using "they/them" pronouns, and how to explain the Black Lives Matter movement to your clueless, idiotic relatives. 206-302-2064
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now
We have a word for a woman who sleeps with a straight couple. That's a unicorn, of course. But what should we call a man who provides the same service? Cuz we have a male caller who is totally down. A woman has reconnected with an old high school chum. The friend immediately asked the caller to be the bridesmaid at her upcoming wedding. The caller said yes, only to learn that the groom-to-be is a Trump-supporting, racist jackass. Should she bail on her sacred duty? On the Magnum version of the show, Dan chats with Author Linda Kay Klein about her book "Pure: Inside the Evangelical Movement that Shamed a Generation of Young Women." The title says it all right? A woman has a great relationship with her boyfriend. But there's one problem. He does financial domination for gay men. She is uncomfortable with this, but really appreciates the cash that comes rolling in to their home. How would you advise her? And with that...Happy Thanksgiving everyone!
Magnum Episode
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now
Subscribe to the Magnum
Ad-free episodes with exclusive extended content
Subscribe now